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PCIntern

(27,752 posts)
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 07:28 PM Yesterday

I have something to say:

So I’m sitting on my porch handing out Halloween candy. I have a table with four Pyrex bowls each with a different kind of candy. As each person comes up, I say “you may take one from each bowl”.

I would estimate that roughly one fifth of the kids cheat. They think I don’t see them but I do. The older kids I don’t say a word but give them “the eye”. They’re already “formed”. The little kids I say, “you took more than one from that bowl, please put the extra one back” which they do, and I hope they’ll think twice in the future and in life.

Now interestingly, I live near a Section 8 development and a lot of the kids come from there. I would say their rate of not listening to me is about 5%. It’s the middle-class kids who “aren’t listening”. Someone needs to convince me not to be surprised.

22 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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I have something to say: (Original Post) PCIntern Yesterday OP
In my area we have 30+% of population missing a paper or two, they are the politest and cutest kids. Silent Type Yesterday #1
That's the case near the practice I work in PCIntern Yesterday #2
The children that came tonight? JustAnotherGen 22 hrs ago #15
I think we had less this year than last. Sadly, likely due to people scared to go out. Silent Type 19 hrs ago #19
I put ForgedCrank Yesterday #3
Not a bad idea. PCIntern Yesterday #4
I know I ForgedCrank Yesterday #5
I agree 100%... PCIntern Yesterday #6
We wrap things up by 9:15 P.M. and turn out the lights. Wednesdays 22 hrs ago #14
Our church had a trunk or treat earlier this week - a couple of hundred kids. Staph Yesterday #7
Halloween is for all of us kids Billsdaughter 23 hrs ago #8
Pencils AverageOldGuy 23 hrs ago #9
I knew you would get to this - entitlement. Kids that already "have" will be more greedy. erronis 23 hrs ago #10
As usual, we have more candy than we need. TomSlick 23 hrs ago #11
Why police them? why not just hand it out instead of giving them the option to fail? WhiskeyGrinder 22 hrs ago #12
The custom I grew up as a kid... Wednesdays 22 hrs ago #16
I beg your pardon! Abolishinist 19 hrs ago #20
I know, right? What if they are allergic to the ingredients in one of the options or just don't like them? meadowlander 19 hrs ago #21
Jesus.... PCIntern 11 hrs ago #22
I have to agree Cirsium 22 hrs ago #13
I was at my son's house. He put out 5 bowls. There were a variety of mini candy bars, 2 kinds of packaged cookies, and appleannie1 22 hrs ago #17
Middle-Class Kids.. jfz9580m 21 hrs ago #18

Silent Type

(11,722 posts)
1. In my area we have 30+% of population missing a paper or two, they are the politest and cutest kids.
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 07:34 PM
Yesterday

I hate that they live in fear of their families being separated.

Hope we see all of them next year.

PCIntern

(27,752 posts)
2. That's the case near the practice I work in
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 07:36 PM
Yesterday

A lot of families won’t leave their house because they’re afraid of getting picked up. ICE. is real busy near where I am out there.

ForgedCrank

(2,944 posts)
3. I put
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 07:39 PM
Yesterday

the huge bowl down off the table and let the little ones take out all they want. the teenagers get one piece of candy that I put in their bag. The little ones think they hit pay dirt, it's really cool

ForgedCrank

(2,944 posts)
5. I know I
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 08:01 PM
Yesterday

shouldn't be, but I get irritated by the teenagers. They are often obnoxious, and way too old to be out collecting candy. I see it as a fun night for the little ones, that's why I do it. I'm on break right now, wife is manning the station. We usually hand out 3 or 4, 5lb bags of candy depending on the weather for the year. Tonight has been really busy. The only thing that gets in the way are their parents, often telling them "that's enough that's enough", but I encourage them to keep digging, I love to see the smiles.

PCIntern

(27,752 posts)
6. I agree 100%...
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 08:08 PM
Yesterday

We were off about 40% because it was cold and really really windy. What I said to the older kids was “Aren’t you a little old for this? You should be out on a date…. they get quiet…

Wednesdays

(21,204 posts)
14. We wrap things up by 9:15 P.M. and turn out the lights.
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 10:24 PM
22 hrs ago

The ones out later than that are teens, usually looking for trouble.

Staph

(6,436 posts)
7. Our church had a trunk or treat earlier this week - a couple of hundred kids.
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 08:29 PM
Yesterday

I held out my bowl and said "you may take two". Every kid over the age of three took two. A couple of the little ones grabbed a handful, but that's okay. Most of them said thank you, too.

FYI, I was dressed as Professor McGonigle from Harry Potter, wand and all. Maybe I intimidated them!


Billsdaughter

(97 posts)
8. Halloween is for all of us kids
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 09:30 PM
23 hrs ago

Former and current. I trick or treated through Freshman year of high-school.

If people, no matter what age, dress up they get candy. That's my line in the sand.

Wishing everyone a safe and spooky fun Hallo-weekend! Boo!

AverageOldGuy

(3,116 posts)
9. Pencils
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 09:43 PM
23 hrs ago

A few years ago we had not stocked up on candy. Wife is retired high school English teacher who always had a few boxes of new standard yellow #2 pencils . We gave kids a choice of candy or a pencil — over half the kids took the pencil!!

Since then we have always laid in a good supply of both. Pencils are still a hit.

This year I was not paying attention and I ordered two gross - 24 dozen - pencils from Amazon - #2, variety of designs and colors. Gave my daughter who lives on Capitol Hill one gross - 144 pencils — she ran out!

We live in an apartment building with only a few kids. First kid took two pencils and said something like “Wow! I need a pencil for school!” So I gave each a dozen. Only about a dozen other kids came by, gave each kid six, have six left now.


erronis

(21,799 posts)
10. I knew you would get to this - entitlement. Kids that already "have" will be more greedy.
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 09:44 PM
23 hrs ago

WhiskeyGrinder

(25,923 posts)
12. Why police them? why not just hand it out instead of giving them the option to fail?
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 10:16 PM
22 hrs ago

it's just a fun holiday my dude

Wednesdays

(21,204 posts)
16. The custom I grew up as a kid...
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 10:29 PM
22 hrs ago

...was to hold open your bag, and the giver dropped in whatever they chose.

That was the etiquette in my circle, but YMMV.

Abolishinist

(2,813 posts)
20. I beg your pardon!
Sat Nov 1, 2025, 01:13 AM
19 hrs ago

Halloween has rules. Having fun for the sake of fun is not an option!

Four bowls, pick only one from each. If you take two from bowl one, two from bowl two, and none from bowls three and four you've broken the rules! How dare you!

meadowlander

(5,018 posts)
21. I know, right? What if they are allergic to the ingredients in one of the options or just don't like them?
Sat Nov 1, 2025, 01:33 AM
19 hrs ago

Why should they get less than other kids because of arbitrary rules?

I enjoyed Halloween when I was kid and got buckets full of free candy. I'm happy to pay it forward now, even to the surly ungrateful teens who grab a handful and can't even be bothered to say thank you. What am I going to do otherwise? Just sit around eating a bunch of junk that isn't good for me anyway.

It's every bit as important to role model generosity and the ability to have fun and get into the spirit of things as it is to enforce honesty.

PCIntern

(27,752 posts)
22. Jesus....
Sat Nov 1, 2025, 09:24 AM
11 hrs ago

Because each bowl had a different type of treat ok? Because I get maybe 500 kids and if I let the early kids take all they want the later kids will be shit out of luck and what’s more:

For you oh-so- righteous folk, the kids from the section 8 housing come later because their parents get off from work later, and they would be the ones who I wasn’t helping out. I know here it would be extremely upsetting if I said that I gave away all my candy to the rich white kids first, and then tough shit to the black kids and the Hispanic kids who came around. And you know what, those kids are the most polite, the parents are the most appreciative and I feel good about helping them out. If I let these early kids, just take what they want, There would be nothing left for the more disadvantaged kids. But I guess you folks have thousands of dollars worth of candy to give out every holiday and have tons of leftover. I spent almost $200 on candy and the hours down here are from 6 PM to 8 PM and I was virtually depleted by the end of the two hours. Please don’t tell me what I should or need to do in my environment. That’s ignorant and uninformed of what I have to contend with, as opposed to what you have to deal with. Everyone’s situation is different and we handle it the best we can. Keep your criticisms to yourself.

Cirsium

(3,059 posts)
13. I have to agree
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 10:16 PM
22 hrs ago
It’s the middle-class kids who “aren’t listening”


We find that in our environmental organization work it is the upper middle class people who do not listen. I guess they already know everything, or so they think. Hey! They are highly successful people and you can't argue with success! Blue collar people, poor people, do listen.

appleannie1

(5,379 posts)
17. I was at my son's house. He put out 5 bowls. There were a variety of mini candy bars, 2 kinds of packaged cookies, and
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 10:38 PM
22 hrs ago

a bowl of lolly pops. He also put out small water bottles. I put out a bowl of a variety of mini candy bars and a bowl of lolly pops. A friend had a big bowl of a variety of candy. I simply said you can have the choice of 2 on this table and the choice of two from these two bowls and a choice of two from that bowl. . They looked shocked. The older kids followed my direction. About 95% said thank you. The little ones grabbed a handful and told the parents it was ok when the parent tried to intervene. My son manned the adult trick or drink table. There were jello shots, marguaritas, and canned beer. Amazing how many adults came back for seconds after taking the kids home.

jfz9580m

(16,016 posts)
18. Middle-Class Kids..
Fri Oct 31, 2025, 10:56 PM
21 hrs ago

I am one (albeit not American).
I would probably have stormed off in a huff at being explicitly told to take only one, rather than trusted to not take more than my share
;-/..I was always rather sensitive. I would have done it quietly though..

But it is one reason why I ponder how best to get people to listen wrt the tragedy of the commons for instance. There is no magic formula. I suppose we will only know when the world stops being as alarming as it is.

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