The Epstein files are really devastating because they remind me of how many girls and women miss out on professional...

[demmiblue]

* Thread from Bluesky…

the Epstein files are really devastating because they remind me of how many girls and women miss out on professional opportunities, mentorship and careers because of how many powerful, rich and influential men only view girls and women — and interactions with them — through the lens of sex

It doesn't matter what the women said or did, how educated or successful they are, how faithful she is to her partner, anything. The Epstein files explicitly detail how these men (and their allies) emailed each other for advice and strategy on sex with girls and women, as well as helping each other.

At the same time, the extent of the Washington Post layoffs highlight how it didn't matter how hardworking, loyal, smart, collaborative, award-winning, competitive, knowledgeable and devoted so many of the staff were. It wasn't enough to prevent being laid off by one of the richest men in the world.

It's hard, as both a woman and a journalist, to understand both of these things and figure out a path forward. I can't mitigate them through more personal effort, education or professional experience. And it's galling to read the defenses for the layoffs and the people named in the Epstein files.

How many opportunities did I lose because men I encountered or worked with did (or didn't) think of me as someone they could get in bed? What was the point of a reporter willing to cover an active warzone if they were still laid off after bad decisions made by the paper's senior managers and owner?

If I think about the Epstein files and the layoffs too much, I won't apply for jobs and reply to emails. But it's hard trying to function "like normal" when things are devastating on so many levels, besides remembering why I became a reporter, and that I need to be a reliable person for myself too.

People who reply "this point is not new", it's hard to begin to understand the extent of the damage to countless girls and women over many decades when the latest addition to the Epstein files database included "more than 3 million pages, 2,000 videos and 180,000 images". www.pbs.org/newshour/sho...

I am trying to read as many of the replies and quote-posts as I can, but many of them are very sad and illustrate how many others have suffered as a result of this pervasive attitude of girls and women primarily as sex objects. It's heartbreaking to see.

[2naSalit]

1. Well...

I know for a fact that is why is was never able to get anywhere professionally. If I wouldn't fuck or blow somebody, my paycheck was either lower or I wouldn't get the job in the first place. Performing sex for a job was a dealbreaker for me.

[cksmithy]

2. Yet, it was so common, that people today can't believe it.

It was part of the 3 martini lunch routine, men became really handsy after lunch. Like you, I ignored them and got the reputation of being mean. I received a good salary and union benefits, so f um. I was an administrative assistant, no real opportunity to move up. Didn't have to tolerate their bs, as long as I could type.

[2naSalit]

3. I was...

"Mouthy" because I stood up for myself and could outwit them in conversation.

Sometimes it was kind of fun messing with the wee minds of those poor dolts.

[slightlv]

4. "Mouthy"... oh my! I was called that more than once!

As well as "aggressive" and "feminist" (said in a demeaning manner).

In one meeting where I would not let a point go until my emphasis was made, I was told to "let it go" by one of the black male members there. I was stupefied. I had stood up for him on so many occasions, and yet here HE was cutting me down on a point that was vital to my continued willful employment there.

After the meeting, I couldn't even be around him, I was so angry. I thought if we minorities can't stick together to get things done for ALL of us... we're ALL going to fall once again!

The next morning at the office frig, he had the audacity to say "do you have anything to say to me" (Meaning an apology). Honestly, the thought had never crossed my mind... but I DID let him know basically what I said in this message. And I told him his PHD didn't mean diddly squat to these white men when it interfered with what they wanted, and I'd get off the high horse about it. Simply because he had risen through the ranks for gain the money to afford himself study and hard work toward a PHD didn't mean everyone else was beneath him... and that women were still (and especially in the DoD) on the bottoms of the almighty totem poles.

I tell you, he was taken aback with my attitude! Couldn't believe that a short white woman would dare talk about the disparities of employment among minorities and not shut up and be totally on his side! I don't know that he ever "got it"... and mores the shame for it, IMO. It never stopped me from sticking up and helping those around me, regardless of where they were in the social pecking order... and I considered myself a better person for putting myself out there for them.

As you can tell, years after it happened, this event still raises a passion in me.

[2naSalit]

5. Much of the time...

I was dealing with a rough crowd but I still managed to stand my ground no matter what in sort of the same way. In many cases, I simply had to show them I had the skill sets I proclaimed and that I could actually do their jobs better than they did. Usually shut them up pretty quick. The managers required a little more effort but I often had the upper hand in the situations so that was helpful.

I try not to relive those events now, though I may write a book in the near future regarding my experiences. I'll save my excitement for then.

[Silver Gaia]

6. Do write that book!

Self-publish it if you have to, but tell your story and get it out there! Our stories, every single one of them, are IMPORTANT. They are part of our history and need to be told! Do it!