Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News Editorials & Other Articles General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

alfredo

(60,134 posts)
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 07:17 PM Nov 2023

Sunday morning I say goodbye to the love of my life

3AM,Thursday my wife had a massive stroke. She screamed and said she can’t move her leg. After that she lost the ability to speak, and lost the use of her left arm. EMS got here quickly and took her to Central Baptist in Lexington Ky. She was then heavily sedated, and was put on life support. The Blood clot was lodged in her brain stem
The doctors were honest about her chances. There is no chance for recovery. Life support will be disconnected tomorrow morning.
For 42 years we lived a life full of love. Our love was quite evident to all. We never quarreled, when there was tension it was my cluelessness at fault. I already miss her, and always will.

Jae, I love you and will until I draw my last breath

184 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Sunday morning I say goodbye to the love of my life (Original Post) alfredo Nov 2023 OP
so very sorry Alfredo. CANADIANBEAVER69 Nov 2023 #1
Deepest condolences to you. Nt spooky3 Nov 2023 #2
I am so sorry for your loss LetMyPeopleVote Nov 2023 #3
How awful. My heart goes out to you and yours. Srkdqltr Nov 2023 #4
So sorry this happened to you and your love Attilatheblond Nov 2023 #5
Horrible--so sorry for this. May she depart in comfort and peace. Wingus Dingus Nov 2023 #6
❤️ underpants Nov 2023 #7
So very sorry for your profound loss. FalloutShelter Nov 2023 #8
I am so sorry, my dear alfredo . . . Your loss is palpable through your words. CaliforniaPeggy Nov 2023 #9
She's still fighting. alfredo Nov 2023 #175
My ❤️ is with you claudette Nov 2023 #177
How good she's still fighting, dear alfredo. I'm glad too that you're staying at her side. ♥ CaliforniaPeggy Nov 2023 #178
Im so sorry Alfredo. CentralMass Nov 2023 #182
❤️ leftieNanner Nov 2023 #10
I'm so sorry, kozar Nov 2023 #11
Alfredo, my heart goes out to you with deep sympathy Deuxcents Nov 2023 #12
My Condolences. onecaliberal Nov 2023 #13
What can one say? I'm so terribly sorry. sinkingfeeling Nov 2023 #14
I'm so, so sorry! Ocelot II Nov 2023 #15
I wish there was something that could be done sdfernando Nov 2023 #16
I'm so sorry for your soul-crushing loss, alfredo. brer cat Nov 2023 #17
Ohhhhh... Alfredo, I am so sorry. Scrivener7 Nov 2023 #18
So sorry to hear this, take care of yourself Shellback Squid Nov 2023 #19
I'm so very sorry Alfredo. Goddessartist Nov 2023 #20
((alfredo)) blm Nov 2023 #21
My condolences to you and your family, alfredo. mobeau69 Nov 2023 #22
I am so sorry for you, nocoincidences Nov 2023 #23
I'm so sorry for your loss. cate94 Nov 2023 #24
I am so sorry that this tragedy is upon you. I have no more words I can offer ms liberty Nov 2023 #25
My deepest sympathies. Always remember the special love. Bundbuster Nov 2023 #26
My sincerest condolences, alfredo Docreed2003 Nov 2023 #27
I'm so sorry, Alfredo. Deepest condolences. Mousetoescamper Nov 2023 #28
Geez...so so sorry! PortTack Nov 2023 #29
I am so very sorry. CottonBear Nov 2023 #30
You have my deepest condolences OhioChick Nov 2023 #31
This is awful to hear PlutosHeart Nov 2023 #32
I'm so sorry. lapucelle Nov 2023 #33
I am so sorry gopiscrap Nov 2023 #34
alfredo barbtries Nov 2023 #35
Oh dear... 2naSalit Nov 2023 #36
I am so very sorry... Trueblue Texan Nov 2023 #37
HUGE group hug, alfredo. elleng Nov 2023 #38
So sad Marthe48 Nov 2023 #39
How very sad, I'm so very sorry. Tesha Nov 2023 #40
I am so sorry Alfredo. That is heartbreaking Evolve Dammit Nov 2023 #41
As a fellow Lexington resident, Mr. Evil Nov 2023 #42
42 years, wow.. Permanut Nov 2023 #43
so very sorry peacebuzzard Nov 2023 #44
My sincere condolences ☮ walkingman Nov 2023 #45
I'm so sorry, Alfredo. How heartbreaking to lose her. highplainsdem Nov 2023 #46
I am so sorry. May her memory comfort you in your grief. chia Nov 2023 #47
I'm so sorry. area51 Nov 2023 #48
I am very, very, very sorry. I can only imagine your pain and wish you the peace of remembering your love. NNadir Nov 2023 #49
I'm so sorry. Chellee Nov 2023 #50
💕 louslobbs Nov 2023 #51
.... Skittles Nov 2023 #52
I am so truly sorry Chicagogrl1 Nov 2023 #53
I am so sorry... Kali Nov 2023 #54
Oh my. MontanaMama Nov 2023 #55
I'm so sorry, alfredo. badhair77 Nov 2023 #56
I am so, so sorry. Diamond_Dog Nov 2023 #57
I'm glad you posted this on Democratic Underground chouchou Nov 2023 #58
My deepest sympathies. CrispyQ Nov 2023 #59
I'm so sorry mountain grammy Nov 2023 #60
I'm so sorry for your loss and heartbreak. femmedem Nov 2023 #61
Oh dear Alfredo Mira Nov 2023 #62
... RKP5637 Nov 2023 #63
I am so very very sorry for your loss. littlewolf Nov 2023 #64
My heartfelt condolences, Alfredo... GiqueCee Nov 2023 #65
I am so sorry for your loss, Alfredo Hekate Nov 2023 #66
So sorry, alfredo. ❤️ littlemissmartypants Nov 2023 #67
I'm holding you both in my heart. 🕯️ Think. Again. Nov 2023 #68
Alfredo, I am so sorry for your loss. greatauntoftriplets Nov 2023 #69
I am so, so sorry. I can't imagine what you are going through. MLAA Nov 2023 #70
I'm so sorry Danmel Nov 2023 #71
I'm very sorry Bristlecone Nov 2023 #72
I am so very sorry for your loss, alfredo Silver Gaia Nov 2023 #73
Cherish the memories of your beautiful lives together. housecat Nov 2023 #74
I am so very sorry for your loss, alfredo. Silver Gaia Nov 2023 #75
I'm so sorry. Sending love and prayers to you both. woodsprite Nov 2023 #76
Peace and condolences for your loss. Dulcinea Nov 2023 #77
I'm so very sorry.nt stage left Nov 2023 #78
It eases my mind when I reflect . . . Journeyman Nov 2023 #79
Deepest Sympathies farmbo Nov 2023 #80
From another Kentuckian JohnnyLib2 Nov 2023 #81
I am so sorry for your loss. Yours sounds like a true love story. tblue37 Nov 2023 #82
It sounds like you have a lot of good times to remember. Mr.Bill Nov 2023 #83
Such a loving tribute. 3catwoman3 Nov 2023 #84
So sorry for you 🙏. demosincebirth Nov 2023 #85
I'm sorry to hear of this Alfredo Tom Kitten Nov 2023 #86
I'm sorry for your loss, alfredo. yonder Nov 2023 #87
That 3auld6phart Nov 2023 #88
I am sorry to hear this. Ms. Toad Nov 2023 #89
There are obviously no words that are adequate localroger Nov 2023 #90
I am so very sorry... Alliepoo Nov 2023 #91
So very sorry, alfredo JudyM Nov 2023 #92
My condolences CentralMass Nov 2023 #93
I'm so sorry for your loss. 58Sunliner Nov 2023 #94
soulmates orleans Nov 2023 #95
I am so very sorry, alfredo. pnwmom Nov 2023 #96
I am so sorry alfredo. Maraya1969 Nov 2023 #97
I am so sorry for your loss. NewHendoLib Nov 2023 #98
I'm so sorry Bettie Nov 2023 #99
She was lucky to have you and BigmanPigman Nov 2023 #100
I am so sorry. The suddenness is a whole different shock 1WorldHope Nov 2023 #101
I'm so sorry to hear this Alfredo. Bluethroughu Nov 2023 #102
I am so sorry. blue neen Nov 2023 #103
Holding you and Jae in my heart. n/t TygrBright Nov 2023 #104
My heart felt sympathy goes out to you and your family. Fla Dem Nov 2023 #105
Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss. ancianita Nov 2023 #106
I am so sorry to hear this, alfredo. mnhtnbb Nov 2023 #107
I'm so sorry for your loss. Ilsa Nov 2023 #108
I'm so sorry, Alfredo. sueh Nov 2023 #109
SSo sorry, I cannot imagine what you are going through. essaynnc Nov 2023 #110
Condolences... IrishAfricanAmerican Nov 2023 #111
So sorry, alfredo! pazzyanne Nov 2023 #112
I'm so sorry FemDemERA Nov 2023 #113
Aw, damn... calimary Nov 2023 #114
Heartbreaking.... Bayard Nov 2023 #115
I am so sorry. Gore1FL Nov 2023 #116
I am so sorry. LoisB Nov 2023 #117
How horrible!! Beacool Nov 2023 #118
So sorry Alfredo. May her memory be a blessing. GoneOffShore Nov 2023 #119
I am so sorry for your loss Alfredo. Grumpy Old Guy Nov 2023 #120
My heart goes out to you. Hope22 Nov 2023 #121
I'm so, so sorry democrank Nov 2023 #122
so very sorry markie Nov 2023 #123
So sad to babylonsister Nov 2023 #124
I am so so sorry for your sudden loss happy feet Nov 2023 #125
Condolences alfredo gademocrat7 Nov 2023 #126
My heart breaks for you PJMcK Nov 2023 #127
So sorry for your lost vishnura Nov 2023 #128
I can't begin to understand the sorrow you must feel Klondike Kat Nov 2023 #129
I am so very sorry. Can't imagine what you are going through. You had 42 years which is really very amazing. ratchiweenie Nov 2023 #130
So very sorry for your samplegirl Nov 2023 #131
I am so very sorry rambler_american Nov 2023 #132
Words so often seem inadequate. OldBaldy1701E Nov 2023 #133
An amazing tribute LittleGirl Nov 2023 #134
Holding you both in light and love. Your DU family is here niyad Nov 2023 #135
I'm so sorry, Alfredo. WinstonSmith4740 Nov 2023 #136
Condolences alfredo sarge43 Nov 2023 #137
Asking for healing grace!! lrucks1952 Nov 2023 #138
My heart breaks for you. AllyCat Nov 2023 #139
I am very, very sorry. murielm99 Nov 2023 #140
My heart breaks for you. yellerpup Nov 2023 #141
So sorry about your loss. FuzzyRabbit Nov 2023 #142
That was a tough post to read. Jarqui Nov 2023 #143
Sending love and condolences, alfredo. SalmonChantedEvening Nov 2023 #144
Holding you in my thoughts this morning Attilatheblond Nov 2023 #145
Heartbreaking - I am so sorry jmbar2 Nov 2023 #146
Im so so sorry Sugarcoated Nov 2023 #147
I am so sorry for your loss KS Toronado Nov 2023 #148
So sad to hear of this. Deepest & most sincere condolences, Alfredo Hiawatha Pete Nov 2023 #149
I am so very sorry for your loss. CousinIT Nov 2023 #150
My deepest sympathy. I know what you are going through. Paper Roses Nov 2023 #151
Heart-wrenching cilla4progress Nov 2023 #152
I think it's safe to say that everyone on DU is crushed to read your post Blue Owl Nov 2023 #153
Peace world wide wally Nov 2023 #154
My heart goes out to you. pandr32 Nov 2023 #155
So, so sorry for your loss. iluvtennis Nov 2023 #156
There are not enough words Aaeia Nov 2023 #157
I'm so sorry wryter2000 Nov 2023 #158
Oh my, I am so sorry KT2000 Nov 2023 #159
I am very sorry for your loss. Stuart G Nov 2023 #160
so very sorry kanda Nov 2023 #161
Please add my condolences. I am so very sorry for your loss. n/t PatrickforB Nov 2023 #162
Peace and love to you. I walked that terrible road eight years ago. IA8IT Nov 2023 #163
Alfredo, I am so sorry to learn of this devastating and sudden loss. Tanuki Nov 2023 #164
. . . thatcrowwoman Nov 2023 #165
So sorry for your loss. I have no words. SaveOurDemocracy Nov 2023 #166
God bless. Joinfortmill Nov 2023 #167
So, so sorry. Elessar Zappa Nov 2023 #168
Damn, alfredo True Dough Nov 2023 #169
The worlds always a little less when our best leave us. BigOleDummy Nov 2023 #170
So Sorry for you Alfedo marked50 Nov 2023 #171
I wanted to add: we are here for you Skittles Nov 2023 #172
My deepest condolences yankee87 Nov 2023 #173
Heartbreaking. bullimiami Nov 2023 #174
I am so sorry for your loss. c-rational Nov 2023 #176
Can't find words. ariadne0614 Nov 2023 #179
Oh, I am so very sorry! Lunabell Nov 2023 #180
I'm so sorry for your loss, Alfredo. mia Nov 2023 #181
I know, my husband died 10 months ago Richluu Nov 2023 #183
My sweet Jae has passed on. alfredo Nov 2023 #184

alfredo

(60,134 posts)
175. She's still fighting.
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 06:02 PM
Nov 2023

They turned off life support including oxygen at 3:30. She’s still breathing. She will not be all good, she’s locked in. She still reacts to pain, but the response is weak.
I’m staying here to the bitter end. I owe it to her. She stood with me through my Crohn’s disease and Cancer, and even if she didn’t I’d still be here.

sdfernando

(5,378 posts)
16. I wish there was something that could be done
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 07:29 PM
Nov 2023

I can't imagine what you and your family are going through. Just know that your DU family is here to listen and support you.

Peace and love.

brer cat

(26,227 posts)
17. I'm so sorry for your soul-crushing loss, alfredo.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 07:30 PM
Nov 2023

I hope that in time your memories will bring you some measure of peace.

nocoincidences

(2,313 posts)
23. I am so sorry for you,
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 07:35 PM
Nov 2023

having his horrible level of grief after so many years of happiness.

There are not words enough....

gopiscrap

(24,170 posts)
34. I am so sorry
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 07:49 PM
Nov 2023

there aren't words to express such a heart ache. Know that there are others who will pray for you and help where and when they can.

barbtries

(29,748 posts)
35. alfredo
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 07:50 PM
Nov 2023

I'm so sorry.

Do you have family and friends with you? I really hope so, this is such a hard time.

2naSalit

(92,635 posts)
36. Oh dear...
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 07:51 PM
Nov 2023

I send love and strength to both of you!



Alfredo, you are one of my favorites, to know that you are experiencing such a profound loss is heartbreaking. I know that you know that we are here for you.




Trueblue Texan

(2,919 posts)
37. I am so very sorry...
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 07:51 PM
Nov 2023

... may your sweet memories bring you peace and healing. Thank you for the reminder that we should savor every moment with our loved ones.

highplainsdem

(52,294 posts)
46. I'm so sorry, Alfredo. How heartbreaking to lose her.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 08:16 PM
Nov 2023

And so suddenly. An aunt of mine lost her husband of many years to a sudden stroke, and I can barely imagine the pain of such a loss.

But I do believe (though I'm not religious) in an afterlife and reunions with loved ones. And I believe Jae can sense your love even now, every instant, as clearly as ever. Spirit to spirit. That connection can't be broken, even if you have to say goodbye here.

NNadir

(34,645 posts)
49. I am very, very, very sorry. I can only imagine your pain and wish you the peace of remembering your love.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 08:22 PM
Nov 2023

badhair77

(4,600 posts)
56. I'm so sorry, alfredo.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 08:40 PM
Nov 2023

Your grief will take you so many directions but your beautiful words about your life together tell me you’ll find your way to peace. My heart goes out to you with your loss.

femmedem

(8,444 posts)
61. I'm so sorry for your loss and heartbreak.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 08:45 PM
Nov 2023

I don't know what else to say except no one could read your words and not feel the depth of your love.

Mira

(22,475 posts)
62. Oh dear Alfredo
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 08:45 PM
Nov 2023

my heart cramps and my face is wet. I know you are in complete terrifying shock. Take very small steps, be very tender with yourself, and realize that with care for yourself you can get to the other side where the grieving begins, along with the new life for yourself that is waiting to be created. My hand reaches out to you with love and compassion.

GiqueCee

(1,321 posts)
65. My heartfelt condolences, Alfredo...
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 08:48 PM
Nov 2023

... she will live on in your memories of her love and kindness. Never forget her.

MLAA

(18,591 posts)
70. I am so, so sorry. I can't imagine what you are going through.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 08:52 PM
Nov 2023

I am sending you both love and kind thoughts. 💕

Silver Gaia

(4,837 posts)
73. I am so very sorry for your loss, alfredo
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 08:54 PM
Nov 2023

I have no great words of wisdom to share, but please know that the depth of your love shines through in your post and my face is wet with tears as I type these words. My heart is with you. May you find peace in the days and nights to come.

Silver Gaia

(4,837 posts)
75. I am so very sorry for your loss, alfredo.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 08:57 PM
Nov 2023

I have no great words of wisdom to share, but please know that the depth of your love shines through in your words and my face is wet with tears as I type. My heart is with you. May you find peace in the days and nights to come.

woodsprite

(12,194 posts)
76. I'm so sorry. Sending love and prayers to you both.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 08:57 PM
Nov 2023

It sounds like you two had a beautiful life, and the depth of your love is apparent in your writing.

JohnnyLib2

(11,232 posts)
81. From another Kentuckian
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 09:10 PM
Nov 2023

So very sorry about this tragedy, Alfredo. May your memories bring comfort and solace as time goes by. You have the moral support of many.

localroger

(3,705 posts)
90. There are obviously no words that are adequate
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 09:33 PM
Nov 2023

Few of us are lucky enough to have such a love for so long and in such harmony. I have been with my wife for over 40 years and we each know that one of us will eventually have to deal with something like this. It was the same with my parents, who were together for just over 50 years before my mother died. But Dad is still OK at age 82, I see him as often as I can though we live 80 miles apart so it's a stretch. I will say to you what I said to Dad when my mother died in 2014: She would want you to see it through and go on. Mourn and take comfort from those sources that are available, but in the end ask what you would want your love to do if it had been you who suddenly died. The Golden Rule is surprisingly applicable in some situations.

JudyM

(29,517 posts)
92. So very sorry, alfredo
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 09:35 PM
Nov 2023

What a deeply touching writing… my heart goes out to you. Wishing you a heart full of warm memories to comfort you, seems that you genuinely blessed each others lives.

orleans

(34,930 posts)
95. soulmates
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 09:53 PM
Nov 2023

talk to her. her spirit will hear you. and once she gets her bearings on the other side she'll be with you whenever you need her or want her. you were a priority to her in this lifetime, there is no reason to think you will not continue to be a priority to her. 42 years. it doesn't stop or end here. our spirits don't die, energy doesn't die and that love you have for each other will go on and on. it will be the thread that keeps you connected.

i'm sorry both of you are going through this. too sudden. too unexpected.
let her know it's okay, that everything is going to be okay, and you'll find each other again.
because you will.



pnwmom

(109,546 posts)
96. I am so very sorry, alfredo.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 09:54 PM
Nov 2023

With every great love comes the prospect of a great loss, and now it is upon you.

I hope you have family and friends to help you through this, though I know you will never stop missing her.

BigmanPigman

(52,234 posts)
100. She was lucky to have you and
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 10:17 PM
Nov 2023

You were lucky to have her.
Please take care of yourself and be kind to yourself.

1WorldHope

(895 posts)
101. I am so sorry. The suddenness is a whole different shock
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 10:18 PM
Nov 2023

compared to things like cancer where you have more warning. May you have moments of clarity as you go through your grief that give you some comfort.
💙🪷

blue neen

(12,422 posts)
103. I am so sorry.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 10:31 PM
Nov 2023

My husband and I have been married for 43 years. I can't imagine how you must feel right now.

mnhtnbb

(32,051 posts)
107. I am so sorry to hear this, alfredo.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 10:55 PM
Nov 2023

There are no words I can offer that will lessen the pain of your loss. Sending you a big hug.

Ilsa

(62,231 posts)
108. I'm so sorry for your loss.
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 10:58 PM
Nov 2023

I lost my hubby less than two years ago, and it aches something fierce.

Take good care of your heart over the next few years. Heavy grief can change its physical structure.

pazzyanne

(6,601 posts)
112. So sorry, alfredo!
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 11:50 PM
Nov 2023

Words are never enough when facing something like this. Just know that we are here for you!

FemDemERA

(403 posts)
113. I'm so sorry
Sat Nov 4, 2023, 11:56 PM
Nov 2023

Your post touched my heart and I wanted to respond, but all the words I can think of seem so inadequate…

calimary

(84,268 posts)
114. Aw, damn...
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 12:16 AM
Nov 2023

I'm so sorry. Thank you for this note. Thanks for being willing to share such a tough time here, with your DU family.

Even on a weekend like this, it sounds like you were still luckier than many. Forty-two years of love and happiness with the girl of your dreams.

PLEASE stay in touch, alfredo, and PLEASE let us know how you're doing, and whatever anguish you need to get off your chest. We're here, any time of day or night, and we're gonna worry if we don't hear from you. Remember what our Skittles has said (and it's always helped buoy me up a little whenever I'm reminded of it): "Someone's always here."

Bayard

(24,145 posts)
115. Heartbreaking....
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 12:38 AM
Nov 2023

I'm so sorry, Alfredo. Sudden losses can be shocking, and its hard for the heart and mind to grasp it.

It sounds like you had a lovely marriage. I hope you were able to say goodbye.



You can lean on us.

LoisB

(8,627 posts)
117. I am so sorry.
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 01:20 AM
Nov 2023

I am also glad you had those 42 years together. I wish strength for you and peaceful acceptance into The Universe for her. Heartbreaking.

Beacool

(30,322 posts)
118. How horrible!!
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 01:56 AM
Nov 2023

I'm so sorry that this happened to your wife. I can't imagine the pain you're going through. My thoughts are with you.





Grumpy Old Guy

(3,550 posts)
120. I am so sorry for your loss Alfredo.
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 02:04 AM
Nov 2023

I pray that you can find the inner strength to get through the difficult days ahead.

Klondike Kat

(844 posts)
129. I can't begin to understand the sorrow you must feel
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 07:04 AM
Nov 2023

I don't know what else to say - everything seems so trite at times like this.

ratchiweenie

(7,923 posts)
130. I am so very sorry. Can't imagine what you are going through. You had 42 years which is really very amazing.
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 07:14 AM
Nov 2023

WinstonSmith4740

(3,157 posts)
136. I'm so sorry, Alfredo.
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 08:04 AM
Nov 2023

Peace will come to you again. But until it does, we are all here for you. I had to say goodby to my one great love 13 years ago. It does get better. Please remember to take care of yourself.

lrucks1952

(4 posts)
138. Asking for healing grace!!
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 08:54 AM
Nov 2023

Bro Alfredo,

I understand your pain and I send my heartfelt blessings to you...

Jarqui

(10,482 posts)
143. That was a tough post to read.
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 10:15 AM
Nov 2023

I cannot imagine what you are going through.
I've sat here for a while and cannot seem to find very comforting words for the enormity of your loss.

I am so sorry for your loss.

I do have faith in the quality and kindness of this community to help comfort and support you through this terrible time.

Attilatheblond

(4,281 posts)
145. Holding you in my thoughts this morning
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 10:38 AM
Nov 2023

It is such a hard thing. Sending strength for the days, weeks, months, and yes, years ahead. Know the pain eventually softens, and someday, you WILL be able to laugh again, but with a certain bit of melancholy appreciation.

Take care of yourself. And maybe give a trusted neighbor a key to your home. Grief can cause one to misplace items. It's weird.

jmbar2

(6,085 posts)
146. Heartbreaking - I am so sorry
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 10:44 AM
Nov 2023

May she pass peacefully, and may you have some comfort knowing that your love sustained her for many years, and then let her go when it was time.

She will know no other pain now, thanks to you.

CousinIT

(10,159 posts)
150. I am so very sorry for your loss.
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 11:44 AM
Nov 2023

Especially that it has come so suddenly and unexpectedly. I wish you much strength and peace at this very difficult time. May her memory be a blessing to you and bring smiles rather than tears in the times to come.

Paper Roses

(7,505 posts)
151. My deepest sympathy. I know what you are going through.
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 11:46 AM
Nov 2023

I lost my husband to a stroke 15 years ago. He was alive in the ambulance, went to emergency care at the hospital, There was no hope for him. I will never get over this, no matter how long. My thoughts are with you and I hope the outcome is better than you expect. It has been 15 years and I'm alone. Hard to cope. We were married for 45 years. No sign of problem before the stroke. The silent killer.

Blue Owl

(54,706 posts)
153. I think it's safe to say that everyone on DU is crushed to read your post
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 11:48 AM
Nov 2023

Peace be with you, and we are all thinking of you this a.m.

pandr32

(12,159 posts)
155. My heart goes out to you.
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 12:04 PM
Nov 2023

I cannot possibly imagine how deeply painful and wrenching this must be for you as I have not lived it, yet just reading your post caused me to tear up. I can imagine you are going through hell.
I am so sorry.

Aaeia

(89 posts)
157. There are not enough words
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 12:36 PM
Nov 2023

No amount of sympathies will ameliorate this loss to you. Grieve with grace and try to believe that she'll never be that far from you. Love like yours will never truly die.

Tanuki

(15,307 posts)
164. Alfredo, I am so sorry to learn of this devastating and sudden loss.
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 02:28 PM
Nov 2023

I hope you have loved ones near who can support you and help you work through your bereavement and honor Jae, gently sharing the happy memories you will always have. I also hope it helps to know that your DU family is always here for you.

True Dough

(20,206 posts)
169. Damn, alfredo
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 04:19 PM
Nov 2023

This was a tough read. But nowhere near the extreme difficulty you must be having coping with such a tragic loss. I wish you strength.

Take care.

Lunabell

(6,802 posts)
180. Oh, I am so very sorry!
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 06:46 PM
Nov 2023

What a wonderful life y'all must have had together. Such a lovely thing you wrote. Y'all were lucky/fortunate to have had those many years of togetherness. I'm sending you my virtual hug to both of you. Hold her. Love her. Play her favorite song. Spray whatever scent she loved. She knows you are there for her at this time. Then, surround yourself with family, loved ones and friends. Let them love you and help you through this long walk.

I bid you peace. Jae is a very lucky lady to have such a loving man in her life.

Richluu

(97 posts)
183. I know, my husband died 10 months ago
Sun Nov 5, 2023, 10:05 PM
Nov 2023

Cry for two months, then rebuild your life. She wants you to be happy. Serve others so you don't get lost in your self. You will get through this!

Latest Discussions»Support Forums»Bereavement»Sunday morning I say good...