Serious qestion: I feel like I'm being gaslit. Where does the perception of "Democratic elitism" come from?

[In It to Win It]

I'm genuinely curious.

Aside Republicans who have tag us with the "coastal elites" and "privileged college-educated people", I'm seeing prominent left-leaning figures repeating it as the reason we lost.

Since the election, I've read tons of articles, op-eds, and discussions here on DU about how Democrats need to stop talking down to people; how Democrats tell working people that "you're too transphobic", too sexist, too stupid to understand, or whatever else... and "that's the reason Democrats lost."

I see articles like that and I think "you've been scrolling through Twitter too much. Who did that? Is it a bunch of liberals and left wing academics online that have no power and no one voted for?"

It wasn't Joe Biden. It wasn't Kamala Harris. I didn't see any House and Senate Dems run on identity issues. I saw a bunch of cost of living ads, border and immigration ads, inflation ads and so on. The few times I watched town halls and debates, I didn't hear candidates talk about "culture war" or "identity" issues. I didn't see any "woke" stuff.

Where is the identity policy? Did I miss it?

Over the last 4 years, I've seen little "identity politics" from Democratic politicians. I've seen very little "talking down to regular people" by Democratic politicians. Yet, all I've heard for last week and a half is that the Democrats are the "smarty pants" party; the "college educated party"; the "talk down to working people" party.... but, WHERE?

Is there a part of Democratic politics that I'm missing? I honestly feel like I'm being gaslit.