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True Dough

(25,932 posts)
44. I'll bet if your mom could post here in the Lounge,
Wed Dec 10, 2025, 03:16 AM
Dec 10

she'd tell us that you didn't pick up after yourself enough as a boy.

But, more importantly, she's incredibly proud of her loving and devoted son and the man he is today.

Both of my folks have passed. Mom at 64 to lung cancer that metastasized into bone cancer. Less than 3 months from diagnosis until her death.

Dad, who had all kinds of heart issues — bypass surgery, multiple stents and Afib from the age of 51 — died eight years later, just shy of his 73rd birthday. But it wasn't his heart that ultimately got him. He developed lung cancer that metastasized into bone cancer. He too was gone within 3 months. I don't know the likelihood of my parents dying from identical causes, but they defied those odds. And, if you're wondering, both were smokers for most of their lives, so that contributed, no doubt.

Anyway, I took unpaid time off from work to be with them in their final months. There were quite a few days and nights sitting by their bedside in the hospital reassuring them that everything was okay as they hallucinated from the cocktail of painkillers that they were given. It's the least I could do after all the comfort they'd given me over the years.

It took a long time to get over not having them around anymore. But whenever I'd feel somber while missing them, I'd remind myself that neither of them would want me feeling glum over their absence. They made so many sacrifices for my sister and I, anything to make us happy.

So if they caught me wallowing, they'd remind me that life is short and to enjoy the days that I have left. And, although it's easier said than done, that is what I try to do because that is definitely what they'd want.

Be good to yourself, Lucky!

Recommendations

4 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

Each of our stories have wisdom for the rest of us. Thank you for sharing. Biophilic Dec 9 #1
You did good. Nothing more important in life than taking care of your parents, except for raising a child. applegrove Dec 9 #2
Seeing your parent safely through their live is important too IbogaProject Dec 9 #20
You were a wonderful son. greatauntoftriplets Dec 9 #3
I know how you feel, my mom died when I was 39 Walleye Dec 9 #4
An honor to read your post. Attilatheblond Dec 9 #5
it is an honor markie Dec 9 #6
You were a loving and responsible son, Lucky. brer cat Dec 9 #7
Okay, now I have tears in my eyes PatSeg Dec 9 #8
Thank you for sharing this. It helped me today. n/t TygrBright Dec 9 #9
Sounds as if you were an incredibly good son, Lucky peggysue2 Dec 9 #10
Lucky... Niagara Dec 9 #11
Thank you , Lucky Charms. You are a great person. May the memories of your mom be a blessing to you. debm55 Dec 9 #12
Please don't be hard on yourself. You were an amazing son to your mom. If you put everything you did for your mom chia Dec 9 #13
You are a very good person, Lucky sheshe2 Dec 9 #14
Thank you for sharing your story Lucky FemDemERA Dec 9 #15
Lucky, your mom was an amazing person and you are also. TommieMommy Dec 9 #16
I'm sobbing now mountain grammy Dec 9 #17
"1) People leave you when you are at your weakest. They just...fucking desert you. How do your siblings, or anyone Clouds Passing Dec 9 #18
I should be so lucky to have my sons turn out like you. flying_wahini Dec 9 #19
You and your Mom did good LuckyCharms. c-rational Dec 9 #21
I can relate to your story. multigraincracker Dec 9 #22
Thank you so much for sharing these important and painful memories with us LuckyCharms. JMCKUSICK Dec 9 #23
Thank you, LuckyCharms, for sharing your stories with us. HeartsCanHope Dec 9 #24
She forgives you, I'm very sure. mahina Dec 9 #25
gentle hug 🫂 to you mwmisses4289 Dec 9 #26
I lost my mom three months ago BeyondGeography Dec 9 #27
Lucky, you gave your mom something money can't buy: loyalty & devotion. SheltieLover Dec 9 #28
What a beautiful, human story LuckyCharms. To read it was both heart-warming and heart-rending. Thanks back to you KPN Dec 9 #29
Cathartic. cachukis Dec 9 #30
You have brothers and sisters you haven't met yet. Harker Dec 9 #31
That hit me like an arrow to the heart. I'm currently caring for my disabled husband while still Ziggysmom Dec 9 #32
I see a lot of me in your story skydive forever Dec 9 #33
Please watch a youtube video, They look human but they have no soul. Karadeniz Dec 9 #34
You did more than you know. mercuryblues Dec 9 #35
Thanks for the post. ificandream Dec 9 #36
She knew what you were doing Lucky, and she embraced YOU. Maru Kitteh Dec 9 #37
... Solly Mack Dec 9 #38
Love in its brightest, most powerful form. lostnfound Dec 9 #39
Pretty close to late sixties here, too. hamsterjill Dec 9 #40
Thank you for that wonderful story jcboon Dec 9 #41
You're a good egg róisín_dubh Dec 10 #42
The moon must be in one of those phases BaronChocula Dec 10 #43
I'll bet if your mom could post here in the Lounge, True Dough Dec 10 #44
''The world breaks everyone and afterward, some are strong at the broken places.'' Donkees Dec 10 #45
Two things are clear... Trueblue Texan Dec 10 #46
You have me in tears malaise Dec 10 #47
I would be proud to have you for a son. Ilsa Dec 10 #48
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