Stressed over some medical screening appointments today

[hamsterjill]

16. The childhood stuff is really hard!

Five and a half is very young. And that's a lot!

I was eight when my mother passed away after a long battle with cancer. I'm in my sixties now, so that was way back when there wasn't much treatment available. There was a lot of trauma - ambulances at the house in the middle of the night, hospital stays, etc.

I've spoken to therapists a few times about it over my lifetime, and the thing that made the most sense to me was this: Your memories of these things are the memories of the age you were when they happened. At that vulnerable age, ALL of those feelings come flushing back. The fear, the helplessness, the confusion, the questions, etc. You are that child once again when you remember the events.

I have to tell myself that I'm not that child. That I'm an adult and that I'm not helpless. I work on doing that during these times, but I have yet to be completely successful in dealing with it. I get better at it, but I never get OVER it completely. I was a wreck over having to get the COVID vaccine, and there were people on DU who laughed about it. No understanding of it whatsoever. There were several other DU'ers who had the same fears, and I met some good friends over it.

So, we have a shared experience, and I thank you for understanding. If there is ever a time that I can lend a shoulder to you, please, you have only to ask.