Bereavement

livetohike

(23,368 posts)

5. In 1992, when my Grandmother died, my Aunt said to me "Everything is going to be different now."

Mon Dec 12, 2011, 08:14 PM

Dec 2011

She was right. We don't gather as a big family anymore since Grandma was the focal point of our Christmas Eve celebration. I think it is true for all families.

My Dad died in Nov. 2004 - since it was close to Thanksgiving, the entire holiday season has been affected with sadness. My Mom hasn't had any "Christmas spirit" since my Dad passed. Just today she said, "I'm not in the spirit of Christmas." So, I will go down there as I have every year and drag some of her decorations out, help her put up a small tree and help her hang the cards she receives. She still hasn't sent any yet this year. Now she is saying she isn't going over to my brother's where we have been celebrating Christmas Eve since my Dad died. She says this every year.

I think whatever way you choose to decorate is a good start. I told my Mom that her grandchildren (all young adults) are still excited about Christmas and when they come to see her over the holiday week, wouldn't it be nice if her house at least looked like Christmas?

Hugs to you and your family during this holiday season. New traditions have to be started. Everything is going to be different (as my Aunt said).

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Hello my friends. I am having real trouble with Christmas. [View all] Paper Roses Dec 2011 OP

Hugs... Tikki Dec 2011 #1

I am so sorry for your loss. bitchkitty Dec 2011 #2

I think any advice I might give would sound condescending. Geoff R. Casavant Dec 2011 #3

Me too JustAnotherGen Dec 2011 #4

In 1992, when my Grandmother died, my Aunt said to me "Everything is going to be different now." livetohike Dec 2011 #5

My grandma died in July 2003 47of74 Dec 2011 #10

It's hard, but you realize how precious the time is and are taking steps to livetohike Dec 2011 #12

So sorry... We are Devo Dec 2011 #6

I just now saw your post and I'm so pleased there are others here who replied auntAgonist Dec 2011 #7

Sympathizing Blandocyte Dec 2011 #8

I agree.. We are Devo Dec 2011 #9

Me too... pipi_k Dec 2011 #11

This message was self-deleted by its author Mosby Dec 2011 #13

Dec. 17, my son died I don't want to go into the details but, Josh is missed by all who loved him Tippy Dec 2011 #14

thinking of you .. and so terribly sorry for your loss. auntAgonist Dec 2011 #15

Thank you....it helps to have a place to visit when things get tough.. Tippy Dec 2011 #16

you certainly weren't the only one with these feelings orleans Dec 2011 #17

Life, and death, comes at you fast, then you have the holidays.. curious_citizen Dec 2011 #18

Yours is such a heart wrenching story .. auntAgonist Dec 2011 #19

Thanks curious_citizen Jan 2012 #20