Wow....last entry was from 2013?. Or did I read that wrong.....

[Attilatheblond]

43. Seems like the 3 month mark is often when the grief really kicks in hard.

The initial shock wears off and the lonely really starts taking a toll. I have found that peer groups are often very helpful as you get to listen and talk to others going thru various stages of grief. You would probably be helped by getting to know some peers you can talk to, who understand better what it's like.

Often, family and friends can be at a complete loss as to how to help, afraid to say things that might 'trigger' your grief, so they just sort of clam up. It doesn't mean they don't care. It often means they just don't know what to say and how to listen.

I remember the hitting the 3 month mark and I would do just about anything to NOT be in the house without my husband. Doing errands, carefully, as the mind is not always 'in the zone' while out driving, was a safer place. When I turned the car for home, the fountain of tears would often force me to pull over.

It's hell rattling around the house, and you might be helped by having some time with others in similar situation. Check around for any widows group in your area. Maybe contact some churches to see if pastors know of such groups. Sometimes, local libraries have meeting rooms where groups meet, so you might check with your local library staff.

Know people here care, and many know about the place you are at. Reach out. Sometimes, it helps just to know there are people who are there and know.