Bereavement

certainot

(9,090 posts)

117. it's not you, it was her

Reply to sinkingfeeling (Original post)

Tue Apr 18, 2017, 11:57 PM

Apr 2017

she wanted it. don't let it eat you up.

it can eat people up for decades. fuck that.

Edit history

Please sign in to view edit histories.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

218 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

My sister committed suicide today. I'm the one who.found her and [View all] sinkingfeeling Apr 2017 OP

So very sorry for your loss. Dakotacrat Apr 2017 #1

So sorry for both you and for her. The grief and sorrow of losing a spouse can be overwhelming. SharonAnn Apr 2017 #126

No Words Me. Apr 2017 #2

That is sad Break time Apr 2017 #3

I am so sorry for you Hokie Apr 2017 #4

I am so very sorry for your loss. femmedem Apr 2017 #5

I'm so sorry elehhhhna Apr 2017 #6

so sorry kanda Apr 2017 #7

Oh my God I'm so sorry sharp_stick Apr 2017 #8

I am so sorry for your loss . Sibling stuff can be very hard... bettyellen Apr 2017 #9

I am so sorry for your loss sinkingfeeling. May the good memories livetohike Apr 2017 #10

I am so sorry KT2000 Apr 2017 #11

I am so sorry for your loss. Lifelong Protester Apr 2017 #12

I can't even imagine the pain you're feeling... Docreed2003 Apr 2017 #13

Oh you must have so much going through your head and heart right now. lunasun Apr 2017 #14

Oh no. I'm so sorry. Laffy Kat Apr 2017 #15

Really sorry for your loss. What you went through is so traumatic. I hope you have someone to still_one Apr 2017 #16

There are no words adequate to convey my sadness reading your post... hlthe2b Apr 2017 #17

I've lost several friends to suicide OceanChick Apr 2017 #18

Our local Hospice was a great help to my daughter and her 5 year old son when the baby died of SIDS Hekate Apr 2017 #66

I am so terribly sorry, sf. I want to add my support for Ocean's suggestion. BlancheSplanchnik Apr 2017 #181

So very sorry! Snarkoleptic Apr 2017 #19

How very sad. madaboutharry Apr 2017 #20

Condolences to you -- and I'm so sorry that you were the one who found her. spooky3 Apr 2017 #21

I am so, so sorry. PoindexterOglethorpe Apr 2017 #22

I am sorry for your loss. nt Gore1FL Apr 2017 #23

Oh, my dear, that babylonsister Apr 2017 #24

I'm very sorry for your loss. Ilsa Apr 2017 #25

My heart goes out to you... Jack-o-Lantern Apr 2017 #26

I'm so sorry you had to go through this. I cant imagine the horror williesgirl Apr 2017 #27

Thinking of you MFM008 Apr 2017 #28

I am so very sorry for your loss. SaveOurDemocracy Apr 2017 #29

There are no words... lapucelle Apr 2017 #30

My brother did it in 2010. It just crushed my Mom, who died in 2015. Chasstev365 Apr 2017 #31

So sorry!! All of us are here for you. n/t Tess49 Apr 2017 #32

I am very sorry. teezy Apr 2017 #33

I am so sorry this has happened. CousinIT Apr 2017 #34

I'm so very sorry ailsagirl Apr 2017 #35

I am so sorry AwakeAtLast Apr 2017 #36

I'm so sorry for your loss. yardwork Apr 2017 #37

I don't even know what to say except I'm so sorry. Hang in there. OregonBlue Apr 2017 #38

Oh dear! 2naSalit Apr 2017 #39

So very very sorry. 50 Shades Of Blue Apr 2017 #40

My dad hanged himself in 1973- This won't go away. Please find a group, a therapist, a clergy-person NBachers Apr 2017 #41

Sorry you had to experience a terrific loss this way. grantcart Apr 2017 #108

.. Cha Apr 2017 #42

My condolences for your loss. We never know how a person will handle the loss of a spouse. Frustratedlady Apr 2017 #43

I feel so sorry for you. It's a shame people who are depressed Lint Head Apr 2017 #44

I am very sorry shenmue Apr 2017 #45

I'm so so very sorry..... onecaliberal Apr 2017 #46

I am in tears ... NanceGreggs Apr 2017 #47

I was there too TrogL Apr 2017 #142

I am so sorry for your loss. NanceGreggs Apr 2017 #215

I'm so sorry. Greybnk48 Apr 2017 #48

I'm so sorry for your loss. MelissaB Apr 2017 #49

I'm so sorry. cate94 Apr 2017 #50

... FailureToCommunicate Apr 2017 #51

Words cannot express. . my Heart aches for You. furtheradu Apr 2017 #52

My mom did the same thing ten months after my father died. She was 78. I found her. notdarkyet Apr 2017 #53

I'm very sorry for your loss and pain luvMIdog Apr 2017 #54

So sorry. SleeplessinSoCal Apr 2017 #55

Thank you all. The worse to me was that she was a trained social worker, but I couldn't get her to sinkingfeeling Apr 2017 #56

People in the helping professions have a high suicide rate. missingthebigdog Apr 2017 #95

I am so sorry. My brother is in the hospital after a AJT Apr 2017 #57

I am so sorry :( meadowlark5 Apr 2017 #58

My sister did the same last November Xipe Totec Apr 2017 #59

My condolences on the loss of your sister. gademocrat7 Apr 2017 #60

How awful for you. I'm so very sorry for your staggering loss. Hekate Apr 2017 #61

That's terrible, so sorry for your loss hibbing Apr 2017 #62

Deep compassion Equinox Moon Apr 2017 #63

I'm sorry for your loss, but I have thought about doing the same thing rather than having my loved mia Apr 2017 #64

I am so sorry. redwitch Apr 2017 #65

I'm sorry for your loss and I'm even more sorry that you were the one who found her... TheDebbieDee Apr 2017 #67

I am so sorry. Glimmer of Hope Apr 2017 #68

Oh my goodness, you and the family are in my prayers. iluvtennis Apr 2017 #69

I'm so sorry Danmel Apr 2017 #70

I am so sorry Frances Apr 2017 #71

I too am so sorry, Hamlette Apr 2017 #72

So sorry for your loss. amerikat Apr 2017 #73

I'm so sorry for your loss. beveeheart Apr 2017 #74

Please accept my sincere sympathy for your loss. The human spirit endures. Enoki33 Apr 2017 #75

No words Omaha Steve Apr 2017 #76

How very sad for you both. 3catwoman3 Apr 2017 #77

Your anger is normal. brer cat Apr 2017 #78

I am so sorry for your loss. (eom) StevieM Apr 2017 #79

Very sorry for your loss Denis 11 Apr 2017 #80

Sorry to hear that......... Dyedinthewoolliberal Apr 2017 #81

My sincerest condolences to you and your family ornotna Apr 2017 #82

So sorry😞 we can do it Apr 2017 #83

I am so very sorry. CBHagman Apr 2017 #84

I am so sorry for your loss sinkingfeeling ... Greywing Apr 2017 #85

I am so so sorry irisblue Apr 2017 #86

I'm so very sorry for your loss. Depression is so rough kysrsoze Apr 2017 #87

I am so sorry for your loss... I have had several very, very close friends that committed suicide... Raster Apr 2017 #88

Prayers and Hayduke Bomgarte Apr 2017 #89

I am thinking of you BadgerMom Apr 2017 #90

Heartfelt condolences to you and your family - PAMod Apr 2017 #91

I'm so sorry, sinkingfeeling fishwax Apr 2017 #92

Understand your feelings. orangecrush Apr 2017 #93

I am so sorry. My heart goes out to you. Doreen Apr 2017 #94

I am so sorry. murielm99 Apr 2017 #96

I'm so sorry for your loss. YOHABLO Apr 2017 #97

So sorry, be well randr Apr 2017 #98

I'm very so sorry for your loss BainsBane Apr 2017 #99

I am sorry for the pain you must feel. LisaM Apr 2017 #100

Adding my prayers and thoughts tavernier Apr 2017 #101

There are no words to express chillfactor Apr 2017 #102

Please accept my most sincere and heartfelt condolences. colorado_ufo Apr 2017 #103

My profound condolences to you and family. kairos12 Apr 2017 #104

I'm so sorry. DesertRat Apr 2017 #105

That's rough duty. Very rough. Strength and honor. WheelWalker Apr 2017 #106

I have been there too, my sister tried 5 years ago ... RainCaster Apr 2017 #107

So sorry for you :( Anger is normal. sharedvalues Apr 2017 #109

How terrible. I'm deeply sorry. nolabear Apr 2017 #110

Oh, God. I am so sorry. My deepest condolence. nt jrthin Apr 2017 #111

I'm sorry. Please accept my prayers and condolences. Lyricalinklines Apr 2017 #112

First, condolences Algernon Moncrieff Apr 2017 #113

I'm very sorry for your loss. EllieBC Apr 2017 #114

I'm so sorry LeftInTX Apr 2017 #115

This is devastating. So very, very sorry. EOM elfin Apr 2017 #116

it's not you, it was her certainot Apr 2017 #117

I am so very sorry. susanna Apr 2017 #118

I'm very sorry as well. It is very hard to lose someone you love. PatrickforO Apr 2017 #119

I am very sorry for your terrible loss. Old Crow Apr 2017 #120

I'm sending compassion and strength to you in your time of sorrow. democrank Apr 2017 #121

Message deleted by DU the Administrators BarbaRosa Apr 2017 #122

I am so so sorry. I hope you can find a peace that passes understanding Maraya1969 Apr 2017 #123

I'm very sorry to hear that. SomethingNew Apr 2017 #124

I'm so sorry. TDale313 Apr 2017 #125

I'm so very sorry janterry Apr 2017 #127

I am so very sorry for your loss. WomenRising2017 Apr 2017 #128

There truly are no words... just hoping you find peace. InAbLuEsTaTe Apr 2017 #129

Your family is in our thoughts and prayers TeamPooka Apr 2017 #130

I am so sorry for your loss. CanonRay Apr 2017 #131

Oh sf. MontanaMama Apr 2017 #132

I'm sorry Afromania Apr 2017 #133

that is heartbreaking. orleans Apr 2017 #134

I am so very, very sorry for your loss. pdxflyboy Apr 2017 #135

Sometimes that is the best option for a person and it is not an easy decision, I KNOW TOO! BigmanPigman Apr 2017 #136

This Is Sooo RobinA Apr 2017 #177

I am so very sorry, sinkingfeeling. pnwmom Apr 2017 #137

So, so sorry for your loss Samantha Apr 2017 #138

... defacto7 Apr 2017 #139

So heartbreaking, sinkingfeeling. Granny M Apr 2017 #140

What a terrible thing lillypaddle Apr 2017 #141

I'm so sorry. area51 Apr 2017 #143

:( sakabatou Apr 2017 #144

I am so sorry for your loss. barbtries Apr 2017 #145

I am so very sorry for your loss TxDemChem Apr 2017 #146

There are no words. anniebelle Apr 2017 #147

(((hugs)), don't know what to say. sueh Apr 2017 #148

My deepest sympathies.... flygal Apr 2017 #149

Love and peace to you... Freedomofspeech Apr 2017 #150

OMG DinahMoeHum Apr 2017 #151

I am so sorry for your loss. But she obviously couldnt caroldansen Apr 2017 #152

So sorry for you. N_E_1 for Tennis Apr 2017 #153

I'm very sorry. Please find someone to talk to about it. Nitram Apr 2017 #154

Deepest sympathies. Scarsdale Apr 2017 #155

So very sorry redstateblues Apr 2017 #156

Ahhh shit friend retrowire Apr 2017 #157

Sorry for your loss. Paladin Apr 2017 #158

So sorry DownriverDem Apr 2017 #159

I'm so sorry Fresh_Start Apr 2017 #160

My condolences for your loss krakfiend Apr 2017 #161

This made me cry---so sorry panader0 Apr 2017 #162

I'm so very sad for you amuse bouche Apr 2017 #163

Sorry harun Apr 2017 #164

To echo what everyone else has said, I can't imagine tour loss Victor_c3 Apr 2017 #165

My condolences and prayers left-of-center2012 Apr 2017 #166

I am so sorry for your loss! LongTomH Apr 2017 #167

My deepest sympathy (((hug))) Arazi Apr 2017 #168

OMG! I'm so sorry sdfernando Apr 2017 #169

I'm so sorry for your loss kimbutgar Apr 2017 #170

Aw, I'm so sorry to hear this, sinkingfeeling. calimary Apr 2017 #171

(((((((((((sf)))))) so very, very sorry for your devastating loss. as others have said, niyad Apr 2017 #172

I am so sorry for your loss. sheshe2 Apr 2017 #173

So sorry for your loss. mithnanthy Apr 2017 #174

How terrible wryter2000 Apr 2017 #175

So sorry for your loss pandr32 Apr 2017 #176

Sorry for your loss Stuart G Apr 2017 #178

Heat JeaneRaye Apr 2017 #179

Did you not notice what forum this was posted in? I have been a member of DU sinkingfeeling Apr 2017 #185

everyone processes grief differently n/t deek Apr 2017 #192

It's obvious to me that this group isn't for you. We are a SUPPORT group not a tearing down group. auntAgonist Apr 2017 #216

I hope all of our replies give you some bit of comfort. bitterross Apr 2017 #180

My sympathies Fatemah2774 Apr 2017 #182

I am so very sorry for you... Useless in FL Apr 2017 #183

My deepest sympathies for your loss. ATL Ebony Apr 2017 #184

So sorry you have to experience such anguish and grief. Wishing you moments of peace JudyM Apr 2017 #186

Hugs to you, your son and your daughter lunatica Apr 2017 #187

Dear God Highway61 Apr 2017 #188

Wishing you comfort and strength BadGimp Apr 2017 #189

So very sorry ... Mme. Defarge Apr 2017 #190

So sorry for your loss deek Apr 2017 #191

Yea... Understand completely. busterbrown Apr 2017 #193

more than one life torn asunder oldcynic Apr 2017 #194

My sister committed suicide today. I'm the one who.found her and dembat Apr 2017 #195

I cannot possibly comprehend your loss ..but my deepest condolences are with you. Le Gaucher Apr 2017 #196

I'm so sorry Nwgirl503 Apr 2017 #197

She must have really suffered! Stellar Apr 2017 #198

Im so sorry for your loss. You have my condolences SummerSnow Apr 2017 #199

I'm so sorry Sienna86 Apr 2017 #200

Oh No! I am so sorry for this loss and WhiteTara Apr 2017 #201

I'm so sorry. nt raccoon Apr 2017 #202

I am so sorry. Worried senior Apr 2017 #203

So sorry oldtime dfl_er Apr 2017 #204

So very very sorry joeybee12 Apr 2017 #205

My deepest sympathy for you and your family. progressoid Apr 2017 #206

I so very sorry your sister lost lexington filly Apr 2017 #207

It's hard to lose a sister, but this way was brutal. Paka Apr 2017 #208

Sorry LiberalBrooke Apr 2017 #209

I'm so sorry for everything you and your family are going through tibbir Apr 2017 #210

I'm so sorry.. mountain grammy Apr 2017 #211

Tears shared. raven mad Apr 2017 #212

sinkingfeeling, please accept my sincerest condolences... ClusterFreak Apr 2017 #213

I am so sorry for your loss. nycbos Apr 2017 #214

I cannot begin to imagine your pain at this time. I hope you can find some comfort here auntAgonist Apr 2017 #217

Thank yoy. I'm doing pretty good so far. sinkingfeeling Apr 2017 #218